airplanes and children

I should be packing right now. But I don't feel like doing that I feel like writing. So I suppose I should write something productive and helpful. How about how I have managed more than 15 travel expeditions that include flying with at least one toddler, most of which I was the only adult with them?

Scoop and I on flight #12

Yup, thats me. I will probably never forget the extreme loathing I felt radiating off of the other passengers that first flight. I was the enemy, I walked on the plane with my 18 month-old singing. I mean, seriously, he was a baby just singing a little made up tune of his. But for some reason others saw that as a bad omen for a horrible flight, and felt the need to make sure we felt their contempt.

After the first few fiasco flights that involved screaming babies feeding off each others screams, poop explosions, and breastfeeding next to a creepy man, I felt like an old pro. I would like to share my wisdoms and funny stories in hopes that you too will feel like an old pro or at least know that in your situation some one else (me) has been there too.

First, and probably one of the most important tips I feel like I can give is you only need ONE BAG for carry on. You really want to make sure that that bag is a hands free bag as well. There isn't much worse than trying to grab all of your bags and stroller to chase after a toddler to only have your strap fall off your shoulder/ everything fall out of your cute hobo purse/ having to drag (not roll because its upside down) a rollie bag.

So just one bag, I use a super size back pack that has all sorts of pockets. That way when I need to go in search of what I need I know where to find it. No bottomless pit digging is a big plus in my eyes.

Second is baby wearing. Really its awesome. I know you guys know that I am a strap-them-to-you kinda lady but when traveling its even better. Especially if you are traveling with more than one child. Again hands free is just worth its weight in gold. When traveling I use my soft structured carrier (SSC) the Ergo Performance. Maxx on my chest, Theo in the stroller, backpack on my back and we are ready to roll.

When going though security keep in mind that if you are wearing a ring sling regardless you will have to take it off because of the rings and the metal detecter. But you have the option to keep the little ones on if you are wearing a SSC or a woven wrap. The TSA will ask you to please step aside and they will run a small cloth over your hands and process it through a machine to test for explosives. It takes no more than five minutes.

Third is having enough time (and a safe spot) to let your little one burn some fuel. Find an empty gate and let them run loose for thirty or so minutes chase them, play with them and help them to move freely before the flight.

Forth, if you have an overly stimulated child already scratch the above idea and find a (quiet/ solitary) place to help them unwind. Nurse them, read to them, walk with them whatever works best for you guys. Hide under a coat or blanket together and tell stories. Help them to shut out the stimulation from the airport. And if all else fails I use Calm Forte 4 Kids, it a homeopathic blend to help to unwind and get sleepy.

Next, come prepared in that super sized and organized back pack.

Chasing tiny pieces or tiny toys around on a moving plane isn't fun. My boys LOVE all things robots and rocket ships. I make sure that my back pack has at least two chunky robots for them to love on.

A nice movie they love and a good pair of big wrap around your ear kind of headphones. Its not my favorite way to distract them but it helps to let them shut all else out and just relax.

An extra set of clothes, for every thing that may spill, drip, explode, or get them wet you want an extra pair of clothes.

Wet bag/plastic bag and wipes for any of the above you have to clean up.
Attention cloth diapering parents! Consider a 'sposie that is chlorine free/biodegradable, I know it kills me too about having to throw away another thing. Out of sight is not out of mind for my conscience. If you would still like to cloth diaper while flying remember that the used diaper takes up more room than the clean one you are taking out. Leave enough room for those pee soaked ones. And that you may have to go longer than usual without a diaper change, so double stuff/heavy wetter prefold/ extra flat whatever you do for a leaky diaper is a good idea. Bring an extra travel wet bag that zips, just trust me on that one.

If a movie doesn't work bring along a "Craft" for the kids to do to kill time. I say this hesitantly because it depends on how old your little ones are. I have brought play dough to mold on our trays en route, window stickies, crayons and paper, and reusable stickers. As it turns out they are great way for Theo (4) to kill time and he loves all of the above, so does my youngest. But the difference is the Maxx (15 months) wants to have fun eating all of the crafts and my oldest actually crafts.

Last flight Maxx had grabbed a handful of window stickers and shoved them in his mouth before I could scrape them out he had swallowed them. They are bright and colorful and look like gooey candies. I spent the next three poops making sure that he had passed all of them. Not fun.

Snacks! Bring your own. I always feel like I might be paying with my health and soul when we buy airport food. Sheesh that stuff is expensive and pretty yucky. So solutions is bringing a favorite food along for the trip. Try something that won't melt, doesn't need refrigeration, and doesn't need to be heated up. Last trip our snack bags had kale chips, fruit leathers, granola bars, apple slices, homemade chicken nuggets and burritos. I try to make enough munchies for the plane ride and a meal in between flights. It doesn't always work out that way but I would rather have too much food than a screaming child from hunger.

You are getting ready to take off! Its loud, so for the older ones that might get scared pretend its a rocket ship and look like you are having a blast. For the little ones repeat step one but nurse/bottle/pacifier while you get adjusted to altitude.

Laugh, sing, let them sort through your photos on your phone, when the seat belt sign is off let them walk up and down the aisle a few times, explain how the plane works, and remember to be patient with your babies. It is a new and fun experience to fly for the first or even tenth time and they may need a little more time than usual.

Its tough and can be a tiring expedition but YOU CAN DO IT! *weird character in water boy voice*


Anything I miss? Tell me how you fly with your kids and your stories of woe or fun while doing so!

Dan<3

Breast Be Best

Breastfeeding, nursing, milkies, nahnahs, and boppy are a few of the terms I have heard for nursing a baby. Want to guess which one we use? Whats that you say? Milkies? Yes, correct! We even sign "milk" to go with it.

Breastfeeding is something I really enjoy, the benefits for my babies and myself are only a happy side note to the bond that I feel with my little ones. Not to mention I get to sit down and stare into the face of my gorgeous baby several times a day!

I did a some research on this (because as awesome as it would be to know every thing about nursing sadly I do not) and went to my trusty site Breastfeeding Mamas on Facebook.CLICK HERE

Go check them out! They are a wonderful group to be a part of if you are pregnant, nursing or planning on doing either of those things in the near future. They are a group of educated (formally and informally) ladies that are always willing to help a mama out.



So between friends, cyber buddies, and experience I came up with the following breastfeeding scenarios:

1.) The booby drunk baby.
If you have nursed a little one you are sure to be familiar with the milk drunk baby. The phases of milk drunkness:
Buzzed when your little one is all smiles and joy while they coo and nurse.
Tipsy, when hand motions and speech becomes garbled and uncoordinated.
Drunk, baby's eyes are glassy when open and stare off into unknown distances. If they do speak at this point it is unrecognizable and is usually accompanied with drool.
Blacked-out, your baby has reached the point of no return when no noise or touch will rouse them, physical demanor is usually open-mouthed and occasional snorts.

There actually is a biological explanation for the milk induced stupor. When a baby begins to nurse their brain releases hormones that induce sleep. So by the time that little one has a full belly and the sleep hormones are swarming full force they stand no chance at keeping those little eyelids open. Gotta love nature.



2.) The twiddler
For some reason both my babies were under the impression that one boob would not work unless the other nipple was being "twiddled". Not familiar with the "twiddling" term? It is the act of tiny child fingers grasping your nipple while twisting, holding, or tugging on it. Not the coolest feeling in the world. Personally this drives me bonkers and I go to all lengths to protect my poor nipple. Not from the funny feeling or the tugging but from the tiny baby nails that can slice through skin like a cheese wire on a block of cheese. Ouch. Yeah, I know.


3.) The niplash
While nursing, a little one will hear/see/imagine a distraction and suddenly and energetically jerk their head around to look up down and all around the room (still firmly latched onto your boob).


4.) The showering in milk ( willingly and unwillingly)
The act of suddenly breaking latch during let down, wether it be purposefully or not, and then receiving a full face spray of milk. On good days both mother and baby will receive a face full. Need a good laugh? Spray you significant other too while they aren't looking. Then act like you have no idea why they are suddenly wet and sticky.


5.) The emergency boobie
Babies don't discriminate they don't mind when or where you're at when they are hungry they will go on the hunt for that milk. Frantically attempting to suckle anything that touches their face, squirming until they can push their face into your breasts, or sticking their hands down your shirt and rummage around like it's a Mary Poppins bag.


6.) The magic let down
No matter how far you are from your little one when they feel that tummy rumble your milk will come rushing in. I would take a guess that after spending many months sharing a body, we share an innate bond with our babies. One of the better reasons to wear your baby everywhere you go, no huge wet spots on your shirt if baby is already nursing. And if they are cover them up with the baby.


7.) The bouncy house boobies
A story that I have heard more than once: A baby nursing with mom in a reclined position. The babe's head with little neck control and in a boob drunk stupor, rolls and flops onto the other exposed breast. The breast being a wonderfully jiggly thing bounces the babes head back to the other breast. Then back to the other, and back again. The bouncing only amplified by the mama's delirious sleep deprived laughter. Best part, the baby slept through it all.


8.) The noisey boobie
When that milk is so wonderful that your little one has to tell you all about it. While they nurse of course. The garbled version of lovey coos with just the occasional spittle of milk flying.


9.) The elastic boobie
Every now and then (mostly while Pancake is teething) I'll have to break a middle of the night nursing session to get out of bed and go pee/tend to Big Brother/eat coffee ice cream. This is usually how it goes. The babe is in a deep sleep except for the occasional suckle. I begin nursing yoga (see below) and get all the way to a modified position four only to realize Pancake has used his super suction powers and still has my breast in his mouth! Its a frightening sight to see your boob stretch that much and not realize it was happening.


10.) The nursing yoga mama
Yoga to get out of bed after nursing little one to sleep.
Position one: while on side slide legs back in a reaching position towards the edge of the bed, as close to the edge of the bed as you can get.
Position two: move body over to backside with arms in air so not to wake sleeping children.
Position three: hover with arms and legs in air contracting abdominals in to an excruciating pain while child rustles and grunts in sleep.
Position four: with one leg on the floor and one on the bed bend at the waist and touch the floor, while elevating and swinging foot to the floor.
Position six: come to center with hands in prayer and bow. Namaste.


11.) The gymnurstics
Right around the time your little one begins to move independently you can count on gymnurstics commencing. They will only get better with time at hanging upside down/ putting their feet on your face/ grabbing your nose/ clinging to your moving body while they nurse. And so time will only make you better at easily catching and calming flailing toddler limbs into nursing submission.


12.) The booby trapped boobie
Sweat running down your face, your heart is racing to beat out of your chest and pain is exploding in your chest. Thats right you have been booby trapped by the mouth of a teething babe. No need to bite back to show your bigger and badder, just jump and show your in pain and the beast will release you.


13.) The bleeding boobie
In the early stages of nursing with a baby that only knows how to suckle, and a mama that isn't concrete on what a proper latch should look like, sometimes our nipples pay the consequences. Bleeding and cracked nipples are really no laughing matter. The first step in healing is helping your babe to get a proper latch (not get only the nipple in their mouth but as much breast that will fit in there). Then quickly go buy pure coconut oil, and caledula ointment to keep on your abused nipples until they heal.


14.) The enormously engorged boobie
This is for my oversupply mamas. When you sit down to nurse a little one that immediately falls into a boob stupor but is still nursing and you let down at least four or five times in the one sitting. Your other breast begins to look like it is sucking the life out of the opposite side. And when you do finally lay down the little one, instead of doing something that you might have had planned while the babe slept you frantically search for your pump to deflate your breast.


15.) The banned boobie
"You can't do that here."
"Would you please cover up while you do that?"
"There is a lovely bench in the restroom that will accommodate you."
Why are there so many people frightened of seeing a breast be used for its actual purpose? You would think with Victoria Secret boobs being shoved in our televisions, mailboxes, billboards and shopping malls across the nation we would be perfectly comfortable seeing breastfeeding in public. But we still hear those stories of mother and child being forced to leave stores and restaurants for nursing. Our nation has sexualized everything about everything. We seem to have no issue with every ad having a practically naked being, but panic when we think about having to talk about anything to do with breasts. Breastfeeding is the normal and natural way to feed your baby. Have a little nursling? Help normalize breastfeeding in public by feeding your baby where ever you are public or not.


16.) The loved boobie
From the first latch to the last your little one is going to look up at you and marvel at your beauty, love and compassion. That look alone is worth years of bleeding nipples, nighttime yoga adventures and every foot to the face. The love that rushes through your every fiber when your look into the face that you grew within you, and are now helping to continue to flourish, will always beat any nay sayer's negativity.


I know that this list is just the tiniest of lists of all the breastfeeding adventures so PLEASE leave your comments/pictures below on your favorite/funniest/scariest moments while you nursed your little one!

Let's get crunchy!

Recently friends and family had asked me why and how I came to choose the parenting style I use. Most of our friends and family were doubtful of our choices when Theo was born. They had expected us to rear a demon, so just questioning how I use it is a HUGE step in the right direction. In a previous blog I mentioned that I tend to dance in the green pastures of “crunchy granola mama land”. By this I mean that I practice Attachment Parenting also know as Peaceful/Gentle/Hippie/Granola/Crunchy/Natural Parenting. In this blog I’m going to roll through the major ins and outs of what this is to us, how we use it, and a few more details.

I will not go so far as to say I am an expert on this parenting style but what I do with my children work in our home and are loosely based on Attachment Parenting. Not all of this is what all AP families do. AP parenting is about meeting your baby's needs.

First off in Attachment Parenting (AP) many families begin their parenting choices when they are pregnant. By this I mean that they choose to see a midwife instead of an OB-GYN, they chose to omit ultrasounds and invasive procedures, and choose to birth their baby naturally without any drugs. These families go with trusting the mother’s body to do what it was made to do, grow healthy babies. 

I am so happy to say that both of our boys were born naturally with the help of a midwife. What was best about a midwife was that they knew me and what I wanted in each pregnancy and birth. They saw me each time at the appointment and cooed with me at the lubdub noises of the baby's heart. Both my midwives cared about me and my baby.

Theo was born at home into David’s waiting hands in a warm tub of water. Max was born in the hospital (due to a rare blood condition making our pregnancy a high risk one) to my waiting hands that scooped him up to my chest. Both boys didn’t leave my arms until they had been calmed and told they were loved a million times. (Skin to skin contact immediately after birth, it is a precious gift that only you can give your baby.) Once they did leave it was only for the shortest of time to find out their measurements, and then were quickly returned to me and rarely left again in the following weeks. These weeks that passed too quickly were the most tender moments I have ever shared with them and I will never forget their lovely newborn noises.

Another HUGE practice in AP is breast is best. Breast is best. Breast is best. Breast is best. Did I mention that breast is best? In my family’s case I take this to an "extreme". We use baby led weaning and yes that means that I nurse into toddlerhood (gasp!). I don’t particularly like pumping, bottles, dummies, or frankly anyone else feeding my baby. So with this comes nursing in public. I couldn't give a hoot if someone doesn't want to see my baby eat; I’m going to feed him. Max likes to wear his cover as a turban rather than a cover, so I really do try to sit in a discreet area because I don’t want to show my boobs to anyone but if it happens then whoever got a peep usually gets an apologetic smile and I go back to nursing.

Max and I nursing in public. Notice the turban like cover. 

I love that my baby solely depends on my body to nourish his body. I really love sitting down and nursing a cooing little one that looks at you like you are the sun, moon, stars and earth all wrapped into one. With that being said I wouldn't say that it is a simple task, or that there is no sacrifice in it. Most days when I sit down to nurse, Max is so squiggly wiggly that we end up both being sprayed in the face with milk, at least twice. Sometimes if Theo is close enough he’ll get a face full too. Yeah, a distracted active baby (in other words a healthy happy baby) isn’t the easiest to nurse.

But some women cannot even get the chance to nurse their children because of lack of support. It is my belief that many women are faced with the worst difficulties of nursing (low supply, thrush, mastitis, engorgement, and more) and are unable to fight through because of the ill informed society we live in. Simple information and support from loved ones and people trusted can work miracles. Having faced each of the listed problems above I understand the extreme struggle it can be to just feed your baby. My advise to any nursing mother would be to trust your intuition, not your grandmothers saying that your milk is too thin/that baby needs a bottle/you’ll spoil him if you let fall asleep nursing. Do some research, find a lactation consultant, talk to other nursing mothers, and mostly follow your babies cues.

After nursing babies is co-sleeping and bed sharing. This is the act of having a family bed where parents and babies all sleep together. Some cases the family all share one bed, in others cribs or bassinets are attached to the bed and sleep directly next to the parents bed, and in others children sleep in separate beds in the same room. Yes, we bed share in our home. No, I am not going to roll onto my baby in my sleep. Breast feeding mothers have heightened sense of awareness of their babies, especially in newborn days and infancy. (Wooooohoooo mom magic is real!) 

Originally when I first brought Max into our bed it was just Theo and I because David was on deployment. I slept in-between the boys so Theo wouldn’t round house kick Max in his sleep. All was well. Then David came home, and we were a tad smushed in our queen-sized bed. Theo woke up after less than a week of this sleeping arrangement and told me I wanna sleep in my bed Mama, its too smushy in here. And just like that it became just Max in our bed. And every now and then Theo crawls in too and we all snuggle up. I love bed sharing its the best. I don’t have to wake up, and get out of bed, every time Max wakes up needing to nurse.  I simply roll over plug the boob in and fall back to sleep. Awesome. I know.

Another common AP practice is baby wearing. Its one of the new aspects of parenting to me, so please forgive me for not being able to give you every detail. Baby wearing is when instead of using a travel system like a stroller or the cart in a store you carry your child on your body. Some families like to wrap their babies in Moby Wraps or Sleepy Wraps (best for newborns only IMO), some like to buckle them in soft structured carriers like Ergo or Boba, while others sling them with woven wraps or Mei Ties. Some do a little of it all! There are many different baby carriers out there and each different family has different preferences.

I have found that the best part of babywearing is the ability to still do activities and have a happy baby. Baby won't let you set them down for nap? Strap them on to your back/front! How awesome is that? In fact, I write this post as Max snoozes in my ERGO Performance Carrier.

I know it looks like Max is broken here but as soon as I wrap him up he usually passes out. Hence the limp neck form!

BEWARE! Since baby wearing has become more and more popular, more and more retailers are selling less than adequate carriers . "Crotch Danglers". A proper carrier should hold your baby snuggly to your chest, back or hip and shouldn't  face your baby outwards. Your baby should not look like they are rocking the newest bikini when they are in the carrier, they should have their weight rested on their bottom with their legs slightly bent in a hugging position.

http://store.ergobaby.com/
http://www.didymos.de/en/?gclid=CN_k48bxs7UCFYqk4Aodf3QALg
http://www.mobywrap.com/
http://www.bobafamily.com/

The last large practice in our home that I find many other AP parents doing as well is natural medicine. Instead of seeing a doctor every time a cold rears its ugly head (which isn't often), I usually pull out the mega doses of Vitamin C, Echinacea, and water. When Theo became a walking bruise, with each lump, bump and scrape I wrapped his owie in arnica or calendula ointment and ice. We do not vaccinate until our children have a completely developed immune system and even then we will omit many vaccinations. We very sparingly use any other the counter medicines, and Theo has only been on antibiotics twice in his life.

I was raised in a home that practiced homeopathic medicine, and I have spent all of my life living it in granola land. It is a lifestyle that takes practice, patience, knowledge and the right resources, but all that you put in comes back hundred times in good health. And let's face it, what is better than good health?


The stuff above is just the tip of the iceberg! Other common AP practices that we use:

• Anti-Infant Cosmetic Modification. Sounds like a no brainer right? Leaving your baby to chose for themselves if they will modify their body. It means leaving babies bodies alone. No circumcision, no ear-piercing, no modifications. My take on it here.
• Elimination communication. No diapers, not potty training but just reading your baby's body signals to go potty!
• Cloth Diapers that disposable diaper you just tossed will be around to meet your great grandchildren. Gross, look into cloth diapering.
• Child led weaning/ baby led solids: skip the cereal, the airplane spoon, and nurse into  toddlerhood. No its not unnatural. In fact our society is the only one that thinks it is.
• Anti-Cry-it-out method. Its one of the most cruel and unusual methods we use on out babies. We are still parents after the sun sets. 

All of these practices work wonderfully in our home but this may not be the case for anyone else. Now if you'll please excuse me I have to go crunch on more of my granola ways!

Dan